Presents:
Tales of
'LOS PARONOIAS'
A Ride to the West
MOTORCYCLE TRIP
and ride it back to Ann Arbor. I would need to put on new tires. But then my friend Glenn who lives out there had to sell or get rid of his CBR 1000. He wanted to keep it but his wife wanted it gone. So he suggested that I ride it back to Michigan that way he could keep it. When his war department caught wind of that it was shot down in flames. Now it is too late to ship my bike out in order to fit my schedule. So I decide to ride the 93 VFR, 'Whitey' out to San Diego. It has brand new tires on it and I prep it out and its fit as a fiddle.
Its Saturday morning July 29, 6:30 am I hit the road. The sky is threatening. there is rain along I-94 to the west so I head down US-23 South until I get to the toll road I-80. I head west on a very uneventful ride all the way to Iowa City. Iowa, looks like corn and smells like pig poop. My daughter in a phone conversation asks me 'Where's Iowa?' Went north on 380 through Cedar Rapids. 380 turned into 218 and took that and crossed into Minnesota until I got to I-90 west. By then I have traveled 750 miles and I stopped at the Days Inn in Albert Lea. I got the last room they had and it was a suite with a Jacuzzi. I couldn't get that thing filled fast enough and with a bottle of Baileys was able to relax rather nicely. This was quite easily the more boring part of the trip. A friend asked what do you think about or how do you occupy your time in those stretches of shear boredom. I'll sing to myself like Sgt. Peppers the complete thing through or I'll look at the cows and I wonder what in the hell are they thinking about. And what's up with the single cow standing in the middle of the drinking water. If I were a another cow I'd kick its ass.
I headed west on I-90 with hardly any traffic for the most part doing about 90 mph when one of those fancy pants big BMW 1200 whatever they are blew by me. I thought OK Mr. No Helmet lead the way. I kept at his pace about a eighth of a mile back, going about 120 mph for good part of Minnesota.
After awhile it was apparent he was a lot more comfortable at speed then I was, so I slowed a bit and he was out of site. As I crossed into South Dakota still on I-90 the sign said 65 mph and below it was 'speed laws strictly enforced'. Right. I was doing 80 and so was everyone else. South Dakota was pretty boring until I crossed the Missouri River, then it got better. Finally some interesting terrain. Oh yeah by the way it was getting pretty warm out around 100 F. So when I was going by the Badlands I had no desire to wander around there in the heat. I stopped for gas at New Underwood which is about 12 miles east of Rapid City, S.D.. Bikers were starting to be noticeable with the big Sturgis rally coming up. There was a group at the gas station and one noticed that I was from Michigan. He asked 'You ride that crotch rocket all the way from Michigan? Where ya headed?' I said 'San Diego'. He says 'You are one bad dude'! And then he smiled and had about three teeth. 'We are from around Chicago and I thought my ass was sore'. I had to crack up. But it was pretty cool that we can all get along and have something in common. I made it to the motel in Rapid City around 3pm and cleaned up and then headed down to the Black Hills and Mt. Rushmore. Rt. 16 is pretty nice and you go through Keystone, a real tourist trap, to get to Rushmore. Mt Rushmore is awesome. Its just incredible how those faces were created out of a side of a mountain. Inspiring.
I called my friend Deniz who lives in Billings Montana and surprise him and let him know I'm on the way. We have been best friends for over forty years.
Leaving Rapid City, I'm back on I-90 west and go through Sturgis and Spearfish on to Sundance, Wyoming, where I turn off on Rt. 14 and head towards Devils Tower.
Lots of nice twisting and sweeping turns mostly foothills with some nice vistas to the west. I experienced my first set of logging trucks as I got behind a couple.They look like they are ready to tip over and pieces of bark and stuff are flying all over and you can't pass because of the turns and them going all over the road. Then all of sudden there it is, Devils Tower.
Out of Billings I take US-212 down to Red Lodge. As I get closer to Red Lodge through the haze I can make out some huge Mountains. Stop for gas and tell the girl behind the counter who appears hung over to drink some water. Nice town the Rock River runs through it. Now I begin the accent up through the Beartooth Mts. 68 miles of winding breathtaking views going as high as 10,947 ft .Truely one of the most beautiful places I've been. Just incredible.
BEARTOOTH HIGHWAY LINK
I enter the park with everyone else on the planet with some kind of camper/motorhome. Its 100F+, I have my full riding gear on. The speed limit if I remember was about 35-40 mph with a Ranger going by every two to three minutes. Radar on. Its getting more miserable by the minute. Yellowstone will have to wait for another day/year. So I decide that the Northern drive will be all for me. That's from Silver Gate, to Gardiner. I go up North on US-89 that follows the Yellowstone River to Livingston, Montana and connects there to I-90. From there on I-90 I go through Bozeman and Butte all the way to Missoula. Once again there are a lot of areas that are shrouded in smoke. That was basically it for Montana. When I look at a map I just barely saw any of it but what I saw was quite impressive. Beartooth, yeah. Gotta come back, yeah.
Here comes Idaho, Oregon and Washington. I leave out of Missoula on the famous Michigan Ave. aka US-12. First up is Lolo National Forest and Lolo Pass (5,235ft). Just as I cross the border there the smoke intensifies to the point where it almost chokes. There are now a lot of water trucks coming from the west. US-12 follows The Locsha River and The Clearwater River for almost 175 miles. In other words very curvy with elevation changes and very scenic. There is some tight stuff and with the water trucks, kind of nerve wracking. I stop in Lowell to rest and get some gas. There is a guy coming from the west that pulls in seconds after I do on a old Harley from California. He gets off the motorcycle and just tosses his helmet to the ground where it skitters and stops. Its all marred up with Abate (anti helmet group) stickers all over it. Peeing 'n Moaning about the helmet law in Cal. To placate him I tell him that, if I hadn't paid almost 425 dollars for mine, I'd throw it down on the ground too. After a snickers Bar and a chocolate milk, I was on my way. Stay on US-12 and cross over into Washington. I didn't know much about Idaho before I planned this trip. I thought of it as potatoes and where Evel Knievel attempted to jump the Snake River. Its just beautiful.
Now on the other hand I thought I knew a lot about Washington and Oregon. Lots of rain, lots of trees. Green. Wrong. The whole Eastern part of both is bone dry, Northeast Oregon hot desert, at least were I went. I stayed on US-12 all the way through Dodge, Dixie and Walla Walla all the way to the Columbia River. There I got on US-730 crossing into Oregon and followed the river to Boardman. Then I got on I-84 till I got to The Dalles and crossed the river back into Washington and stayed on Route 14 to Stevenson.Saw a lot of wind surfers on the river and could see Mt. Hood to the south. Had a really good dinner at Joe's El Rio Mexican Restaurant in Stevenson. And on my walk back to the motel there are Blackberry bushes everywhere. Mmmm, Mmm.
I decided I wanted to catch Mt St. Helen's at sunrise so I got up at 5 am. Pitch black out I headed up Wind River Rd. I went through Carson and started following this road and there wasn't a whole lot of evidence that I was going the right way. Going up and down and around through these mountain pine forests and no light made me disoriented. Several times wildlife presented itself in the form of birds of prey, deer and elk running or flying out in the road in front of me. Fawns would serpentine in front of me. Finally there was a sign, Mt. St. Helen's ahead. Finally I saw it in a clearing. The white jagged snowcap pinkish dawn peach in color. Part of the road turned to dirt for a while because of a detour. I was passing a ranger station when I saw a sign requiring a pass to be in the National Forest. So I stopped in and inquired. The ranger said as long I was just passing through I wouldn't need one. So I took off headed for Spirit Lake when all of a sudden there was no drive. I looked back and saw the snake like drive chain stretched across the road. Great. Must of lost the master link. I could not find it. So I walked the bike back to the ranger station and they let me use their radio phone. I called the HRCA road assistance number. And in two hours they had a truck out from Longview, Wa. It then took another two hours to get back to Longview to the Honda dealer. They had a master link but it was the stake on kind, so I had them do it. It ended up costing me 25 bucks for them to stake the link, but it cost precious time and I missed out on seeing more of Mt. St. Helen's. Another reason to head back out west if as though I needed one. The tow truck driver was real cool. Gave me the run down on the area. And advised me not to go down US 101 in Oregon. He said it was a man eating snake. The road was not kept up as well as in California and lots of motor homes. So I blasted down I-5 through Oregon until I got to Grants Pass and then took US-199 all the way to Crescent City, California. That was really nice ride except for the logging trucks flying around the corners and when I got to US-101 it was getting late and socked in by the fog causing my face shield to become obscured by water droplets. I would have to wait until the morning before I would see the mighty Pacific Ocean.
And I was back in California again.
The weather conditions are the same as I left them last night, foggy and chilly compared to what I've been going through. But I take off and finally see the Pacific. US-101 wanders back and forth along and the away from the coast. You go through Klamath and Orick.Lots of uphill and long downhill sweepers.
Lots of Redwood trees. Duh. Arcadia is a cool town and so is Eureka along the coast. Then road turns inland dramatically. Took the turnoff to see the Avenue of the Giants,some of the tallest living things on the earth. Then past Leggett still on 101,I head to the coast on the world famous Highway One. There is no other road that comes even close for spectacular Vista's that I have been on. Just that stretch between 101 and the coast has enough curves on it to wear you out. I go through Rockport, Westport and stop in Fort Bragg for gas.Then past Point Cabrillo and Point Arena. There are a lot of side roads that I go by and when I look at a map later will make me take a return trip.
California's Redwood National Parks
Mendocino Coast Link
I continue down Highway One into Sonoma County along the coast through Fish Rock,Stewarts Point, Fort Rosa And Bodega Bay.
Sonoma County Link
Its starting to get late and I wanted to get to San Jose before it got to late so I turned inland until I got to Petaluma and US-101. I worked my way down to San Rafael and Corte Madero and crossing the Golden Gate Bridge which seemed to take forever. Why its Friday after work. Finally made it to San Jose and could not find a Motel room anywhere.
So I called fellow CBR Email lister 'Suzy Rider', and she came and rescued me and saved the day and put me up for the night.She also gave me a very interesting book to read , 'The Racers Image'. Its about this guy who is Canyon Racer and a Breadman. Imagine that.
I leave Sue's place and head for Santa Cruz and down to Monterey on Rt. 17. This is the day I have been waiting for. Its been over twenty years since I've been to Big Sur.& What happened to my priorities? This is another area where you could spend a weeks at least checking out all the roads and sites. Its foggy along the coast so I head down Hwy. 1 through Watsonville and all the farmland, the Artichoke and Strawberry fields as far as the eye can see. Finally, I get into the Monterey area but is still foggy, so I head inland to the Laguna Seca Raceway on Rt. 68. Then I head back to Monterey and Carmel by the Sea. The fog is lifting so its time to head to BIG SUR.
On Hwy. 1, its one breathtaking view after another, with view points galore, turn after turn. I have been half way around the world and I can't think of a more spectacular, spiritual place.
This place is just incredible and bigger than life. Like childbirth, being there or just looking at the pictures, is what makes the difference.John Muir and Ansel Adams are my heroes. I'm there for only hours when it should be for weeks. I take Rt. 41 out of the park, 50+ miles of beauty till you get to Fish Camp. Then its down through the foothills again to Fresno then on Hwy. 99, I rally with a Yellow VFR all the way to Tulare and stay the night at the Days Inn. Its 110 at 6p.m.
That's Margarita weather folks, I make a beeline for the local Mexican restaurant.Two Margarita's for five bucks and they are good size.
Now on the larger scale state map Rt. 245 looks almost straight compared to what it was, 30 miles of tight turn after tight turn. My ass, my sore hurting ass. Ow, my ass hurts. As I keep turning up past 4,000 ft., when in the hell is this road going to end. I go through Badger and Pinehurst and then finally make it to Rt. 180. And I'm still not at the park yet. Finally make it to Grant Grove, at 6,600ft. The Sequia's are awesome. The air is so fresh. There are hundreds of Chickadee's twitering around. I head to San Diego but I have a long ride ahead of me.
I take Generals Highway which is Rt.198 another long winding road up and down. Up and Down. Gosh it would be great to come back and spend a summer up here. Rt. 198 follows the Kaweah River through Three Rivers past Lake Kaweah.I take Rt. 198 back to Rt. 65 South back through Exeter and then down through Lindsey and Porterville all the way to Bakersfield.
Its hot out, over 100F. Then I head East on Hwy 58 towards Tehachapi Pass where all the windmills are and then into the Mojave Desert. At Mojave I take Hwy 14 south to Palmdale. I go by Edwards Air Force Base but nothing much is going on. Then I take Rt 138 East and there is a GD accident that blocks everything. Finally I make to US 15 South and head down to Riverside. When I get there I know I'm on the home stretch. I start rallying with some cars and we are going well over 100mph.We go by a CHP and get the the big time look. Finally after its starting to get dark I get off the 15 on to Hwy 76. I pull up to Glenns house about 8p.m.
They come out of house and I yell out, ' I'm bad to the bone'.
The first ride we have been on together in 25 years. The way it all worked out from the planning stages to the end, everything went great, great, great. I just hope that anyone who rides gets the chance to do something like this.